Chasing the feelings

Lately, I have found that the reason I have been doing has been to try and recreate moments I've felt in the past.

I joined a Latin dance team to recreate a moment I felt the last march. When I was in the middle of Paris, learning to salsa for the very first time with my friends in an overcrowded bar. It was late in the night and the heat from the number of people was subdued by the cool spring breeze. The moment was perfection, I was laughing and grabbing a tight hold on my best friends. Spinning and dancing to the music was dizzying but in a very good way.

I invited too many people to my house to recreate a moment I felt 4 years ago. When I walked into high school for the first time. I remember thinking about how excited I was for the next four years, to be where everyone says changes you. Now, I'm trying to grasp at what little time I have left with the most incredible people in my life because soon their constant presence is going to be gone and I dont know how I can live like that. I invited 25 people to my house (which is much too much to fit into my cozy semi-detached) to try to recreate that joy and safety I felt on the first day of high school when I met some of the loves of my life for the first time and thought they would be there forever.

I bought specific board games, even though I'm an only child and most often have no one to play them with, to recreate a moment I felt this August. When I spent 1 week in a cottage with my extended family, and we split between playing volleyball and codenames, watching movies and singing very loudly and most often badly (save for a few good ones). I have no one to play board games with but I purchased one for almost 30$, in the hope that I could feel the happiness I felt in August again.

I'm sure there are many more things I do, to try and relive the past. The most special days will always be the ones you dont know are the best nights of your life yet. It's incredulous to see how different things were a year ago vs how they are now.

My question for you is whether or not you do the same thing? Do you find yourself doing things today in an attempt to recreate emotions or moments you felt in the past?